Welcome to Pushing Ink, where we mostly discuss the working world, mostly
Let us celebrate the anniversary of the wrong job.
Yes, the wrong job.
Once upon a time, I came across what appeared to be the perfect job. The hours, pay, and job duties perfectly matched my credentials. I applied and was thrilled when they called for an interview almost immediately.
The excitement continued during the interview even when several red flags were presented, including their urgency to hire to no real direction in the interview. I was happy at the prospect of a quick start date and not hearing where you see yourself in five years and why you want to work here. Instead, they asked quirky questions, such as what recent movie I watched.
I felt good as I left the interview.
I felt good as I drove out of town.
I felt good until halfway home when the informal questions, a lack of in-depth details on the previously perfect job duties, and a general gut feeling something was off hit me. Even the possibility of a quick start date began to sour. But when an email arrived stating I was chosen for the job, I accepted.
Prison break
The fall morning of my first day was cold and wet, and the commute was longer than usual, thanks to wall-to-wall traffic. A sign of things to come? Perhaps. My right-on-the-dot, almost late (highly unusual for me) arrival was met with quick introductions before being seated at a messy desk with my back to everyone in the room to stare at training videos all day.
While the first day at a new job is always challenging, I found it harder and harder to fight a growing panic that I’d made a mistake. I looked at the office door, imagining myself walking out as concerns piled up. Things were not quite right, from key items necessary for a new employee that was missing to conversations between peers interrupted by hostile opinions from the manager, to name a few.
When I declared I was taking a lunch break and leaving the building, one would have thought I was making a prison break.
Signs
In her article on the seven signs of a toxic workplace you can spot on the very first day, Monica Torres says to listen to your gut and be on the lookout for these red flags at a new job (visit the link for complete definitions):
No welcome committee
Rude behavior
Gossip
Quick turnover
Wrong values
Differing job duties than hired for
Dread
While some of these were my red flags (I am skipping over a lot that happened), my gut was the biggest sign. A constant, neverending twist, turn, and tightening dread that I tried to ignore. But when I took my lunch break (feeling like Andy after his escape from Shawshank), I did an internet search on how many quit a job on the first day. The results, while not first-day quits, were shocking. Over 30 percent of new hires leave within the first 90 days, 17 percent within the first 30 days, and 16 percent in the first week.
My desire to quit on the first day was not an anomaly. So what was I going to do? Not go back after my lunch hour, run out the door and never return after completing that first day, or feign death? No. I didn’t even make a break for it that first week or month. Instead, I gave it the ol’ college try. I rallied, took risks, and opted for creativity whenever I could. I dug deep and worked hard. Unfortunately, try as I may, the job did not improve. My first review with the boss (an absolute shambles) hastened the downward trajectory, and I gave my notice at 60 days but stayed a full 90 to give them time to find a replacement.
I hadn’t a backup plan, but the relief was worth it, and I had the best Christmas before depression set in for having missed the red flags of the wrong job over a long, jobless winter.
Wrong job vs. no job
Did you know sticking out a bad or the wrong job can be worse for you than no job? We have often been told having a job is better for us than having no job at all. However, a study published in the International Journal of Epidemiology shows that this isn’t always the case.
Utilizing mental and physical health scores during the Great Recession (2008), researchers found those formerly unemployed who transitioned into a bad job (low pay, a lack of autonomy, etc.) had poorer health outcomes than those who remained unemployed. It’s not the first study to discover this paradox but not something readily shared in a workaholic society. Our bootstrap mentality says being unemployed is terrible, and the road to fulfillment and happiness starts with a job. Any job. We worship work with an expectation to stick it out no matter what or, at least, for a set amount of time that may cause more harm than good. And there is no shortage of opinions on how long to stay at a job before leaving. I noted this during my prison break lunch.
Should you stay or should you go?
The magic number, according to internet research, is 12 months. If you decide to leave a job for whatever reason, the experts say to give it at least a year before taking on something new. You don’t want to look like a job hopper! The cry of a one-sided viewpoint when considering employment at will and even death.
Let’s face it. An employee's death is the same if someone quits on day one or 2,382. They are replaced with someone new, or someone else absorbs their job duties, and life goes on. A death may include some kind words and memories shared or even a potluck. While those who abandon the wrong job early may get a middle finger tossed in their direction, that’s about the extent because the working world never stops. So why the struggle over leaving the wrong job? Does it truly matter whether you leave a job at six months or one year?
If I had dropped dead (a potential considering all the anxiety) on the first day at the wrong job, would the boss have shown up at my funeral to hassle my family and friends about quitting too soon?
Um, no.
Gaps
I know what you are going to say. Beth, I'll have a resume gap if I quit this new job without another job. OK, so you quit a bad, I mean the wrong job without a backup, and now have a gap in your resume. So? Does the next potential boss or hiring manager need to know the nitty-gritty about wrong jobs, family emergencies, or life-altering circumstances that made working impossible? Do you need to prove your gap worth with evidence of self-improvement such as taking classes, volunteering, or traveling the globe? Does a potential boss need to know you’ve spent months in therapy because the guilt over leaving the wrong job at 90 days without a backup plan was eating you alive? Or that you spent the gap time gaining XP in the Hitman video game series?
No.
Let me share a quick story for those ruffled by the no.
After lengthy unemployment, a woman struggling after the death of her husband FINALLY snags a job interview. During said interview, the hiring manager asked about the gap in her resume, to which the widow, who did not need to say anything, not even a vague family emergency, shared her husband had died.
Now I don’t know about you, but that’s a big moment, sharing something as personal, difficult, and life-altering as the passing of a loved one with a complete stranger. However, rather than offer condolences, let it go, or even have the courtesy to blush, the hiring manager began to pry into how and why he died.
Does-does that make you uncomfortable? Cause I was uncomfortable hearing the story and outraged, but sadly, not surprised. Fortunately, the widow didn’t regale a single detail of her husband’s death. She didn’t wait to complete the interview out of courtesy or for someone to tell her it was OK to leave after said questioning. She did not go home and do a Google search to see if she did the right thing by walking out of the interview. She just walked out.
Sometimes we need to give ourselves the benefit of the doubt and have a little more respect for our gut. If a job isn’t working or is a bad fit, timing won’t necessarily change anything, and gaps shouldn’t matter. Yes, sometimes financial circumstances keep us in a bad or wrong job. That’s another issue, but why are we destroying our well-being for made-up proprieties such as waiting a year to leave or answering resume gap questions?
So happy anniversary to me on the wrong job and the many lessons that came with it. It’s been rough, but I’m surviving. How about you? Do you have a wrong job story? If so, did you have another job lined up before leaving, take a gap, or what LinkedIn is now calling a career break? What red flags have you experienced during an interview or the first day on the job? Are any of Monica Torres’ red flags acceptable to you, as some people’s red flag is another person’s thumbs up?
In other news
The creep of hidden overwork HERE
Calling what it is, labor rebellion HERE
Ah, humor
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Until next time, my friends, and remember, take your breaks, don’t eat lunch at your desk, breathe, and Friday is right around the corner.
Beth
The Pushing Ink